Hair or No Hair??

This post is random but so relevant in my opinion lol. If you can’t tell from my other posts, I’m pretty open and honest about a lot. I plan on continuing with my pregnancy experiences, but when I get the feeling to write I just can’t hold back.

Just in case you’re just now tuning into Queendom Wife and Mother, I gave birth to my second daughter almost three months ago. Since then it’s been pretty difficult for me to separate from her. This isn’t the greatest situation to be in especially when it comes to the need for self-care. For example, I recently went to the hairdresser to have my locs maintained and she was right on my chest in her baby wrap. I changed her diaper and nursed her when needed during the entire process. I’m so grateful my loctician had no issues with it and actually encouraged me to nurse my baby girl without care.

Now… the problem is I’ve neglected shaving/waxing since having my daughter. Why?? Let’s go through my list of reasons. Reason #1: I had to heal. Reason #2: I could (still can’t) barely pee, poop, shower or eat without the child crying to eat, be changed or see mommy (this includes my 6-year-old). Reason #3: Shaving is SO hard!! I have long locs so they get in the way and are too heavy in bun, AND it takes way too much time if you’re doing it right. I like to look well-groomed, none of that stubby half job mess. Reason #4: Watching the hairs die from Veet scares the living daylights out of me. Reason #5: I like to get waxed, and having an infant with you while your hairs are being snatched is not an option for me. The both of us aren’t allowed to cry at the same time. Reason #6 My husband doesn’t care at all!

Now, the last reason is so important to me and is why I had to blog about this. Don’t get me wrong, my husband loves when I get waxed, BUT he has made it very clear that it’s not important. Although it doesn’t bother him, it definitely bothers me! You can ask any woman and she will agree with this statement… “when your hair isn’t done, you don’t feel like yourself.” Watch the confidence level increase in a woman as she looks in the mirror before she pays her stylist. She’s ready to be seen and take over the world. The same goes for my precious Jewel. Life ain’t right when she’s out here looking like a bear in hibernation (judge me all you want, my husband still loves me lol). But when your girl gets a fresh wax?! I’m ready to run a marathon and ready to model for my man. “Look at her Love, isn’t she pretty?!” Lol I do it every time.

So I need to know, do women shave, wax or veet for themselves or for their man?? If your partner said he didn’t have a problem with your hair, would removing them still be as important to you? I personally do it for myself AND my husband. He may not care, but we both know pubic hair can definitely hold a stench, and I respect and love him way too much to walk around smelling crazy. Also, I feel comfortable and confident when I have been “groomed.” I will say that since having hair doesn’t bother my husband, it takes away the pressure of having to take care of home, the kids, him, and the hair on Jewel! LOL

Published by

Love, Mommy…

April 21, 2020, my husband and I experienced the loss of who we knew was our first born son, Jamir Titan Gurley. As I share my thoughts and feelings, he will be known as TJ and/or Titan.
My hope and prayer for this space is for it to be therapeutic not only for myself, but other women who've experienced pregnancy and/or baby loss. My goal is to build a genuine community where women who were unfortunately thrusted into this life truly find comfort and know they aren't alone. I'm no expert, and I won't pretend to be.

10 thoughts on “Hair or No Hair??”

  1. I am cracking up because I was actually trying to talk myself into going to get a wax this weekend. I don’t get them regularly, but when I do, I feel amazing. I definitely groom for myself. It just makes me feel cleaner. The last time I got one was over the summer and I had Bub with me. He was in his stroller but started zapping out so I had to pick him up, pull my tit out and get waxed while he was nursing. It was a shit show for sure. He’ll be with his dad this weekend so I’m embracing my alone time lol!

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  2. Great post!
    I wax faithfully! Have been since 2006…. I even waxed during my pregnancy lol With that being said, I do it for myself, I have this weird thing where I hate all body hair smh. I’m the girl that shaved her legs and pits all year round. My boyfriend doesn’t care at all…. it makes him no difference whether I wax or not lol but still I go every month. I remember when I got it done in my 9th month of pregnancy and lawd it hurt like hell and I was telling him about it and he was just like why do you even do it?? Lol
    It’s also part of my “me time” so that’s also why I do it being a new mom and not getting a tone of time to breathe.

    Liked by 1 person

    1. Thank you!! I stopped when I was 7 months pregnant lol I was uncomfortable and the crap hurt like hell! Lol so my husband helped me shave (he’s a real one lol). I definitely consider waxing a part “me time” even though it hurts!


  3. First I named my girl Pearl…I will leave out why I named her that lol but I use Veet. I hate shaving!!! First I am fat so it is hard to properly do it without nicking myself, second I hate the itching when the hair grows back. I like her completely bald!! I do it for me and my partners (I have a girlfriend and a Dom). He requires it to be bald. I don’t feel right if I have too much hair on her. Now it’s winter so I don’t veet as often as I do during the wintee months but I do it for all parties involved.

    Liked by 1 person

  4. Great post! It’s definitely great when your partner does not care whether you shave/wax or not. It’s one less thing you HAVE to do, and is more relaxed if you get to it when you can. I too do it for myself. Like you said, it compares to getting your hair done and looking fly!

    Liked by 1 person

  5. So glad you brought this topic up because I have been online and in stores searching for a……..electric shaver!

    I was just admitting to self I have been having “a bad hair day” in my Netherlands. I am currently single and have been for a bit. My desire to be ‘done’ down there is all for me.

    Like you said… a lady doesn’t feel herself until her hair is done! Even when I’m in a relationship I feel soooo much better when I’m layed where I’m layed. I can’t add anything, but post that royal decree because you said a whole mouthful with your mouth! *snaps*

    Liked by 1 person

    1. Yessss thank you for your input!! I have a few friends who love their Jewel, but don’t remove the hair because they are single. First, because they have no one to impress and secondly, they feel once they remove the hair they will have sex because they aren’t ashamed of her appearance lol.


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